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[24 Aug 2008|04:07pm] |
SlytherinFerret: maybe she was killed tragically
SlytherinFerret: by a flock of seagulls
SlytherinFerret: before she could get to it
cigamerisedi: The band? XD
SlytherinFerret: ROFL
SlytherinFerret: YES
SlytherinFerret: EVEN
SlytherinFerret: BETTER
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| Lifetime Original Fanfiction |
[01 Jul 2008|08:32pm] |
slytherati: I had to explain that I like finding horrible mind blowing things and sending them to you
slytherati: like "Harry and Draco have a one night stand, Draco gets pregnant but Harry doesn't find out, until he meets his fifteen year old son for the first time"
SlytherinFerret: .............................................................................................................................
slytherati: I HAVE SEEN THAT ONE
slytherati: VERY RECENTLY
SlytherinFerret: I'M SORRY
SlytherinFerret: SLYTHERINFERRET IS NOW DEAD
SlytherinFerret: IF YOU WOULD LIKE TO LEAVE A MESSAGE, TOO LATE
slytherati: ROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOFL
slytherati: I think
slytherati: that a lot of fic writers take lifetime movie plots and change the names to Harry and Draco
slytherati: I can't wait for the one where Harry gets breast cancer
slytherati: and his best friend, Draco, nurses him through chemo
slytherati: and then Harry's husband cheats on him
SlytherinFerret: okay
SlytherinFerret: I was too dead to even ROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOFL
slytherati: ROOOOOFL
slytherati: I was seriously
slytherati: laughing so hard that my mouth hurts
slytherati: at your death
SlytherinFerret: my dad was like "what the hell is your problem?" and I was just like "AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA"
SlytherinFerret: you made me think of the last lifetime movie I saw
SlytherinFerret: and I'm like
SlytherinFerret: "DRACO GETS RAPED BY HIS DENTIST"
slytherati: ROOOOOOOOOOOOFL
SlytherinFerret: "WHILE HE'S UNDER THE FUNNY GAS"
SlytherinFerret: "AND HARRY HAS TO HELP HIM PIECE TOGETHER WHAT HAPPENED WHEN IT TURNS OUT HE'S PREGNANT BUT HARRY'S INFERTILE"
SlytherinFerret: "EVEN THOUGH AT FIRST HE THINKS DRACO CHEATED"
slytherati: this
slytherati: sounds like the best fic EVER
slytherati: I bet we'd get tons of comments for it
SlytherinFerret: I bet we would
SlytherinFerret: if it turned out
SlytherinFerret: snape was the dentist
slytherati: ROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOFL
slytherati: YES
slytherati: YES
slytherati: YES
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|
| CREEPY BRAIN VOODOO |
[14 Jun 2008|08:45pm] |
This started with us asking each other similar questions at the same time:
[20:41] slytherati: idk
[20:41] SlytherinFerret: idk XD
[20:41] SlytherinFerret: jinx 8DDD
[20:41] slytherati: jinx XD
[20:41] SlytherinFerret: ROFL
[20:41] slytherati: ROFL
[20:41] SlytherinFerret: we jinxed jinxing
[20:41] slytherati: SOB XD
[20:42] SlytherinFerret: okay we need to stop being a hivemind now it's too freaky XD
[20:42] slytherati: iawtc XDD
[20:42] SlytherinFerret: WHAT A SURPRISE
[20:42] slytherati: ROOOOOFL
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| The Rule |
[20 Apr 2008|04:41pm] |
slytherati: man I hate having ship wars with a friend XD
SlytherinFerret: doesn't she know the rule?
SlytherinFerret: the "she'll always end up with the first guy she meets" rule of fiction, film and anime?
slytherati: ROFL
slytherati: I think you mean
slytherati: the "she'll always end up with the awesomest bitch" rule
SlytherinFerret: mmmmm
SlytherinFerret: no
SlytherinFerret: that's not a rule at all XD
slytherati: XDDD
slytherati: IT IS IN MY HEAD OKAY
SlytherinFerret: otherwise miaka would end up with fucking HOTOHORI OR TASUKI
slytherati: if Edward came second
slytherati: he'd still win by a billion
SlytherinFerret: no he wouldn't
SlytherinFerret: it's a rule
slytherati: SOB
SlytherinFerret: you compile a list of suitors
SlytherinFerret: and whoever she met first, she winds up with
SlytherinFerret: the only exception is when it's either an arranged marriage or there's some surly bastard who's been chasing her for years
slytherati: but that means
slytherati: Ginny wins Harry forever ;_;
slytherati: wait
slytherati: HE MET DRACO FIRST
SlytherinFerret: YES HE DID
slytherati: NEVERMIND
SlytherinFerret: SEEE
slytherati: HOLY SHIT
slytherati: I SEE YOUR POINT
SlytherinFerret: GLAD I COULD TALK YOU AROUND
SlytherinFerret: TO MY POINT OF VIEW
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|
|
[19 Apr 2008|02:48pm] |
slytherati: charlie has been going nuts all day
slytherati: when he hunts things he starts kicking violently with his back paws
slytherati: but today he's been kicking HIS OWN HEAD
SlytherinFerret: ROOFL
slytherati: and then whining when it hurts
SlytherinFerret: they use their back paws to gut their prey :D
SlytherinFerret: and spill out their intestines so they can eat them :D
SlytherinFerret: ..if their prey is big enough, like a rabbit
slytherati: well apparently he thinks that my intestines are in my arm
SlytherinFerret: I don't think he should be trying to kill his own head :c
slytherati: and his are in his head
SlytherinFerret: ROFL
SlytherinFerret: charlie would make a crappy velociraptor :c
slytherati: charlie failed anatomy and physiology :c
slytherati: no medical degree for him :c
SlytherinFerret: it's okay, if he failed bio too he can just be a theologian 8D
slytherati: ROOOFL
SlytherinFerret: ....brian just invited me to (spectate) a salsa dancing contest
SlytherinFerret: tell me, sara, does this sound like something I would be interested in?
slytherati: ......
slytherati: why yes, it does
slytherati: as an alternative to death maybe
SlytherinFerret: ROOOOOFL
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|
[18 Apr 2008|03:02am] |
SlytherinFerret: do you think he would appreciate dancing hitler
SlytherinFerret: he's catholic
SlytherinFerret: I think hitler was catholic
SlytherinFerret: it makes sense
slytherati: BEST REASONING EVER
slytherati: that's why you will be making the big bucks as a lawyer
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| a mystery |
[09 Apr 2008|05:39am] |
*** You have been disconnected. Wed Apr 09 05:35:34 2008.
*** "slytherati" signed on at Wed Apr 09 05:35:44 2008.
SlytherinFerret: artemis was inside it and jack was eating it :c
slytherati: artemis was insidewhat? :c
SlytherinFerret: ... XD
SlytherinFerret: SlytherinFerret: I love that I opened the box
SlytherinFerret: and like within the next 30 seconds
SlytherinFerret: artemis was inside it and jack was eating it :c
slytherati: XDDD
SlytherinFerret: that would be a very WTF statement without the first two lines XDDD
SlytherinFerret: "WHAT COULD ARTEMIS BE INSIDE... THAT JACK WOULD _EAT_!??!"
slytherati: I was trying to figure out what the hell that could be XD
slytherati: A BOWL MADE OF BREAD?
SlytherinFerret: ROOOFL
SlytherinFerret: DELICIOUS GUESS
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| Conversations with Dad. |
[06 Apr 2008|07:01pm] |
For some reason this cracked me up.
SlytherinFerret: awww
SlytherinFerret: I don't get the stimulus package if I'm claimed as a dependent on someone else's taxes
Durkinbill: How much is this stimulus
SlytherinFerret: it would be $300
Durkinbill: dont worry about it I will give you it if you need it
SlytherinFerret: woulda been nice to get it from dubbya!
Durkinbill: Actually us taxpayers are where its coming form Dubya does not actually have $$
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|
[02 Apr 2008|09:40pm] |
|
slytherati: sometimes I wonder if Harry really hates the word "closeted"
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| you don't want to know :| |
[29 Mar 2008|04:43am] |
SlytherinFerret: fvgfdgvhafj
SlytherinFerret: you
SlytherinFerret: =
SlytherinFerret: batshit insane
slytherati: rofl, so you finally noticed :c
slytherati: OH GOD
slytherati: OH GOD
slytherati: WHYYYYYY
SlytherinFerret: OW
SlytherinFerret: OW
SlytherinFerret: BRAIN
SlytherinFerret: OW
slytherati: also, either he has a big head or harry has a little winky :c
SlytherinFerret: sDFJGDKFAHYsfdghsfdba
SlytherinFerret: (agreed)
SlytherinFerret: also
SlytherinFerret: NEVER
SlytherinFerret: CALL IT
SlytherinFerret: HIS WINKY
SlytherinFerret: AGAIN
slytherati: XDDDD
SlytherinFerret: it is his dobby
SlytherinFerret: obviously
slytherati: ROFL ASLKDFHASLKDFHAS
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[28 Feb 2008|08:10pm] |
SlytherinFerret: I am vaguely sad she seems to have dropped off the face of the earth, hardly anyone I know now has even heard of her and it's so gratifying to be able to go "did you ever know..?" and have someone go "OMFG YES CRAZY BITCH" XD
SlytherinFerret: it's like commiserating with war buddies
slytherati: XDD
slytherati: oh kai
slytherati: we have such poor taste in lesbians :c
SlytherinFerret: ............
SlytherinFerret: ROOOOOOOOOOOFL
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| on very happy dragons and jewish zombies |
[27 Feb 2008|11:31pm] |
SlytherinFerret: have you read past the first book yet? 8D
SlytherinFerret: because uh
slytherati: oh god don't let it be a dragon orgasm :c
slytherati: is there even anything about hell in the bible?
SlytherinFerret: not in the old testament~!
slytherati: I'm pretty sure jewish people didn't believe in hell
SlytherinFerret: jesus is the one who brought eternal suffering to the masses 8D
slytherati: GREAT JOB JEEBS
SlytherinFerret: which kind of invalidates his reputation as a cool guy to me
SlytherinFerret: "I LOVE YOU ALL SO MUCH"
SlytherinFerret: "THAT YOU WILL ROAST IN ETERNITY FOR NOT LOVING ME BACK"
slytherati: what an attention whore :c
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|
[11 Feb 2008|02:08pm] |
Butler Cell: My Highlander just left Starbucks
Kai Cell: Better go after him!
Butler Cell: I'm at work!
Kai Cell: Love waits for no barista
Butler Cell: I'm going to cry
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| the farthest shit list |
[02 Feb 2008|01:41am] |
SlytherinFerret: 1. walker, slacker
omg duckies: ROFL
SlytherinFerret: 2. kels, slacker
SlytherinFerret: 3. leesh, AWOL
omg duckies: SLACKER TEXAS RANGER
omg duckies: 4? 5? 6?
SlytherinFerret: you! your mom! and the horse you rode in on!
omg duckies: 4. Kaiyu 5. Kaiyu's Mom 6. Bo Lin?
SlytherinFerret: ...............
SlytherinFerret: that's hot, kaiyu.
omg duckies: hey
SlytherinFerret: except I don't think youxyourchar is societally acceptable in rp.
omg duckies: i don't think it's narcissistic to want to bang your own character
SlytherinFerret: I think we actually used to call it "soulbonding" but it went out of vogue.
omg duckies: ROFL
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| PIRATES |
[13 Dec 2007|01:50am] |
SlytherinFerret: ..OMG
SlytherinFerret: http://community.livejournal.com/sparrington/512977.html
SlytherinFerret: I am DYING
SlytherinFerret: that is so going on my wishlist XD
EmikoDuoMaxwell: why do i sense the birth of a new eljay icon XD
SlytherinFerret: BECAUSE IT BEGS FOR ONE
SlytherinFerret: he's going to be like "wtf is this girl giving me patent law 101"
SlytherinFerret: "EPIC FAIL"
SlytherinFerret: (if I were a teacher of any kind, I would have a stamp made specially that said EPIC FAIL)
SlytherinFerret: (and I would use it on students' papers with no other comments just to freak them out)
br1anstage: awesome
br1anstage: I'd take your class and try to get it
SlytherinFerret: I think that is a sign I need to get to bed 8D
EmikoDuoMaxwell: well then off to bed with ye!
SlytherinFerret: aye, cap'n!
EmikoDuoMaxwell: and dont be forgetting to scrub yer teeth and be sayin ye prayers XD
SlytherinFerret: ROFL
SlytherinFerret: but I'm a pirate!
EmikoDuoMaxwell: i dont know i'm trying to think of things to say in piratey language XD
SlytherinFerret: ROFL XDD
EmikoDuoMaxwell: and i'm tired XD
SlytherinFerret: dont be forgettin to swill yer mouth wit rum and be cursin the blaggart what knocked out yer eye? XD
EmikoDuoMaxwell: . . ./sigh i give up, you clearly win pirate language
SlytherinFerret: you're the one who was born on talk like a pirate day!
SlytherinFerret: you should be blessed with the pirate speech!
EmikoDuoMaxwell: i blame being asian. all i can say is welcome to singaporeeee
SlytherinFerret: ROOFL
Also, early-morning humour which could ONLY be appreciated by my father (but he got a fair chuckle out of it anyway):
Dad: L O
Kai: Nut tr
Dad: Call min
Kai: Da ken her
(Translation: Hello // Nutter (crazy person) // Call me, man ("min" makes it a command.. yeah don't ask) // But I don't know her (this girl named Minnie). YEAH THIS JOKE ONLY WORKS IN DORIC. Any Aberdonians in the audience? Bueller? Bueller?)
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| ..um... ew. |
[06 Dec 2007|01:52am] |
dalcrimson: did you know that in order to prevent leaks at wakes, they suture your ass together?
dalcrimson: what the hell
SlytherinFerret: .............................................................................
SlytherinFerret: hi
SlytherinFerret: thank you
SlytherinFerret: so much
SlytherinFerret: for that information
dalcrimson: dude
dalcrimson: can you imagine having your (dead) ass sutured?
dalcrimson: that sounds so.. so... awful
SlytherinFerret: well, no, because I imagine you aren't really aware of much when you're, you know, dead
dalcrimson: well suppose you could actually see yourself after your death
dalcrimson: hypothetically
dalcrimson: i'd be pissed
dalcrimson: i think i'll stipulate in my will that my ass not be sutured
SlytherinFerret: then no one will attend your wake
SlytherinFerret: they'd all be afraid of leakage
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| cue haunted house music |
[18 Nov 2007|12:21pm] |
EmikoDuoMaxwell: i'm going to make a princess peach costume next year
SlytherinFerret: omg
EmikoDuoMaxwell: and it will rock..ROCK I TELL YOU!
SlytherinFerret: you would be such a hawt peach 8D
EmikoDuoMaxwell: or i should go as this
EmikoDuoMaxwell: http://www.nintendopedia.org/images/4/4c/Blooper1.jpg
SlytherinFerret: ahahaha
SlytherinFerret: you do that
SlytherinFerret: and I will be
SlytherinFerret: GOOMBA
EmikoDuoMaxwell: LOL
SlytherinFerret: although it would be fun to go as a ghost
EmikoDuoMaxwell: *sneaks up behind you*
SlytherinFerret: *turns around quickly*
EmikoDuoMaxwell: /)_(\
SlytherinFerret: ROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOFL
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|
[03 Jun 2007|02:58pm] |
SlytherinFerret: she talks to him
SlytherinFerret: ON THE TOILET
MirriPadfootDawg: GROSS
SlytherinFerret: I KNOW
MirriPadfootDawg: (although i've talked to people when i've had to pee before. pooping is a different matter. XD)
SlytherinFerret: ROFL XD
MirriPadfootDawg: pooping requires concentration
MirriPadfootDawg: her dad takes his LAPTOP into the bathroom with him
SlytherinFerret: okay, THAT'S wrong
MirriPadfootDawg: as evidenced when i knocked on the door and he was like "yeeees?" and i was like "nevermind!"
SlytherinFerret: then your laptop has like
MirriPadfootDawg: and when he came out, he was carrying his laptop
SlytherinFerret: essence of poop
MirriPadfootDawg: omg my dad takes the paper in with him
MirriPadfootDawg: and when he comes out
MirriPadfootDawg: i just... i can't read it
MirriPadfootDawg: there are poop-smell-particles on it
SlytherinFerret: my dad
SlytherinFerret: takes MY COOKBOOKS into the bathroom with him
MirriPadfootDawg: WTF
SlytherinFerret: I just about shit myself and was like AAGGHHH WTF DID YOU DOOOOOO
MirriPadfootDawg: that is so wrong
MirriPadfootDawg: if this conversation isn't pillage-worthy, then i don't know what is XD
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[30 May 2007|02:55am] |
mochi attacks: ...someone needs to open a pirate game, by the way. :/ sigh. potc3 :/
SlytherinFerret: IAWTC
SlytherinFerret: but then you have all those pirate elitists telling you you're not historically accurate :C just because everyone's not dying of syphilis, sigh. XD
mochi attacks: rofl, oh silly elitists.
mochi attacks: but..srsly, i want my pirates like my little caesar's pizza: hot and ready. :/ syphilis is so... un...appetizing XD
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[17 May 2007|01:06am] |
SlytherinFerret: OKAY
SlytherinFerret: I HAVE CALLED YOU ALL HERE TODAY
MirriPadfootDawg: YES, MY LORD
SlytherinFerret: BECAUSE
SlytherinFerret: I believe that Kingsley Shacklebolt..
SlytherinFerret: is AN IMPOSTER
MirriPadfootDawg: ROOOOFL
MirriPadfootDawg: I MEAN
SlytherinFerret: I think someone from you-know-who's army may be using polyjuice potion to pull another crouch jr on us
MirriPadfootDawg: that's quite an accusation, ms. ferret
SlytherinFerret: it is, ms. dawg, and it is not one which I make lightly
SlytherinFerret: has anyone else noticed that kingsley's fashion sense lately seems a bit... off?
MirriPadfootDawg: you know
MirriPadfootDawg: now that you mention it
EmikoDuoMaxwell: woah!
MirriPadfootDawg: ms maxwell, what do you make of ms ferret's claim?
EmikoDuoMaxwell: O_O WHAT?! WHO?!
EmikoDuoMaxwell: oh yes! definitely an imposter *nod*nod*
MirriPadfootDawg: perhaps this matter warrants a looking-into
SlytherinFerret: yes, I think so
EmikoDuoMaxwell: hmm...indeed, we must find the real shacklebolt!!!
MirriPadfootDawg: but how?
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